Bright Lights
by Alphakat
Summary: Rachel never thought she could be that girl, the brooding one with nothing but a dream to live for.
1. Mediocracy

Rachel Berry's heart ached soundlessly as she forced herself to walk across McKinley High School's parking lot, her mind a thousand miles away from where it should have been. It'd been hard for the young starlet, dealing with the newfound emptiness in her life over the past couple of weeks, and the challenge of bouncing back from it all had been one of the harshest things she'd ever had to endure. On nights when the pain seemed almost unbearable, like it would never subside, she'd turn to _The Way We Were_ for comfort; Barbra Streisand always soothed Rachel's nerves, even on her darkest of days. Most of the time, it was the only thing that could.

Still, the tears always returned.

Finn Hudson had been everything to her. Now that he was gone, Rachel wasn't sure what it was that she had left other than her prodigious talent; it wasn't like she had many friend out of, or in for that matter, Glee Club. She'd gone from feeling like she was on top of the world back to feeling like the same, unappreciated loser who strived for stardom far more than any normal teenager should. And all because of a stupid mistake. Honestly, it didn't even compare in size with the one Quinn Fabray had made last year, and yet she was the one on Finn's arm nowadays. The girl who'd betrayed him with his bestfriend and ended up pregnant from the light affair was the one who everyone had smothered in empathy as soon as the news had gone public; there'd been never-ending support for the beautiful blonde, all because she was much more acceptable to society. Did no one remember the amount of pain she and Noah had caused Finn? Didn't Finn remember? It simply didn't make any sense.

"Good morning, Rachel."

Mr. William Shuester appeared out of nowhere, falling perfectly into step with her. No wonder the man was eligible for Broadway, Rachel thought as she pursed her lips together before facing the only other person at this school who believed in her and her talent.

"I see nothing good about it, Mr. Shue, but good morning to you as well," Rachel replied solemnly.

The frown he gave her didn't go unnoticed by the brunette; she was trained to notice even the slightest furrowing of skin. Usually when she'd run into her talented teacher, Rachel would be in high spirits, in love with the world for all the great things that had been happening for both herself and the Glee Club, but now she just seemed miserable and upset while trying extremely hard to maintain an air of composure around her fellow peers.

"Hey." Mr. Shue touched her shoulder lightly in an effort to bring her to a stop. "Is everything alright, Rachel?" She kept her brown eyes averted as he spoke, refusing to look like a fool yet again for not being made out of stone the way everyone else appeared to be. "You seem a little upset."

"'A little' would be an understatement," Rachel finally caved.

Mr. Shue crossed his arms. "Do you want to tell me what's going on?"

"There really is no point, Mr. Shue," Rachel brushed the pain away. "I'm simply waiting for everyone to realize how insufferably stupid they've been acting lately, but until then, I'm afraid I'll just have to cope with it for a while longer." She looked up at Mr. Shue with a small smile of reassurance, hoping he would rest assured she'd be alright. "Honestly, I can't bother to worry about other people's future's when mine's barley hanging by thread."

"Rachel," Mr. Shue sighed. "I—"

"After everything that's happened this year," Rachel interrupted, "I thought we would've at least made a microscopic dent on the social ladder. I swear. The football team gets more praise then we do and, mind you, we've won more singing competitions in the past few months then they've scored touchdowns in the past few years. Not to mention Coach Sylvester's even more hellbent on destroying Glee Club than before all because of her damn Cheerios and to top it off, I'm back to being McKinley High's biggest loser. Especially after Finn broke up with me so publicly."

Most of what Rachel had said was old news to Mr. Shue; though he wasn't in accordance, slushy facials weren't exactly an extinct concept around campus and Karofsky seemed to be enjoying pushing Finn up against the lockers from time to time even more. Still, Rachel was tainted by personal issues that appeared to be reeking havoc in her heart and her head and, whether he wanted to or not, he just couldn't do anything about it.

"Rachel," Mr Shue sighed again, taking it all in. "I don't really know what to say."

"There's not much you can say, Mr. Shue, though I know you mean well," Rachel gave him a weak smile. "I've learned to accept that this town is crawling with vile people who's only ambition in life is to crush those of us with true zeal. Thankfully enough, I've had time and practice to build up an immunity to these horrid beings and the only real torture for whatever crime I may have committed in a past life is to withstand another year of this mediocracy before reaching my true potential. I'll see you in Glee, Mr. Shue." The short, yet riveting speech Rachel gave him demonstrated just how true her words truly were. Somehow, it'd been enough to alter her day drastically as well.

Rachel Berry finally felt like herself for the first time in a long time as she walked through the main doors of the school, oblivious to the snickers and glares most of the student body threw her way. In her haste to saunter past such mindless drones without giving them an opportunity to ruin her brand new cardigan with anything artificially-flavored, Rachel barely had time to acknowledge the presence of the football player who'd broken her heart repeatedly. Giving her a look meant to start small talk after days of no communication, Finn was stunned by the way her eyes skimmed over him as if he were just another face in the crowd as she made her way deeper into the bustling hallway.

Hanging back for a moment, Mr. Shue watched the lack of exchange between the two, Rachel's destination evidently far more important than any conversation with the handsome quarterback could be; the girl had done a number to the poor guy, not that Finn would ever admit it out loud, and whether he accepted it or not, he missed her and her projected quirks. All that had happened set aside, from what he could see, Mr. Shue knew that not even Quinn had dedicated as much time to him, cared more for him than Rachel had. Rachel just needed to give Finn time to realize that.


	2. Time To Pretend

It'd only been a few hours but so far, it hadn't been such a bad day.

Rachel bit her bottom lip in concentration, fumbling around in her head with the lyrics to her original song for the thirteenth time that day. Hastily scratching out certain bits of what she'd previously written the day before, she scribbled in her latest musings without a second thought. She'd been going at it for about an hour already; seated at the piano, Rachel's mind was running on a lot more than emotion as she went over each and every aspect of the song a thousand times before moving on to the next. It was her own creation, and she wanted it to be as close to perfection as it possibly could before revealing it in Glee Club that afternoon, but fate had a different idea in mind.

"I'd ask how the song-writing's going," Rachel jumped at the unexpected visiter, "but I really don't care."

Quinn strode in, looking as breathtaking as ever in a lovely sundress Rachel could only imagine drove Finn crazy, before glancing in her direction with eyes as hard as stone. There were no traces of ice, though the look was just as unnerving as ever. For the moment, she'd let Quinn be considering she wasn't exactly trying to draw blood, so to speak, and Rachel had no intention of abandoning all her hard work.

"This room is already occupied, Quinn," Rachel found the nerve to speak, yet keeping her eyes glued to the paper in front of her. "In case you hadn't noticed, so if you could please show yourself out?" The frigidness in those cold, hazel eyes sought out Rachel's brown ones but to no avail; locking gazes with the person who can break your spirit wasn't a wise choice.

"Since when do you decide who's allowed in this room?" Quinn snarled.

"It's simply a proposition," Rachel replied calmly, "considering you don't do too well within close proximity of me. Need I remind you of the less than charismatic way in which you spoke to me yesterday afternoon in the auditorium?" Her eyes flitted momentarily to her before looking away.

"I'm sorry," Quinn raised an eyebrow, "but did I miss some kind of memo?"

"Excuse me?"

"Don't tell me you've suddenly found the courage to stand up to me, RuPaul," Quinn mused, as if the idea could actually be as preposterous as it sounded. "And here I thought you would at least try to make an effort, for Finn's sake. How naive of me." Her lips curled upwards into a smirk.

"The only one naive enough to believe that here was me," Rachel finally allowed herself to look right at the blonde, no fear. "I thought that maybe, after everything that happened with my mother and your daughter last year," Quinn outwardly flinched at the word, "maybe we could find some way to put our constant emotional battle for Finn aside and become friends." Her eyes met Quinn's and for a moment it seemed like she was listening.

"In what world could we ever be friends, Rachel?" Quinn's eyes weren't hard or cold or menacing, but more like condemning and realistic. "I mean, honestly. Think about it. All I've ever done is tease you and make cruel jokes at your expense while at the same time keeping an eye on my boyfriend who, for some reason, keeps on going back to you." Hazel eyes pierced the brunette, trying to drill in thoughts and feelings deep into the depths of her mind.

"I already told you," Rachel swallowed. "Finn and I have something real."

"Real tragic, I'd say," Quinn raised an eyebrow. Rachel's face fell. "You're at the bottom of the pyramid, Rachel. You always will be here. Compromising myself or Finn anymore, and for you nonetheless, would be completely stupid of me."

She was right.

Over the last year, the fall Quinn and Finn had taken on the social ladder had been almost heartbreaking. Rachel was the biggest loser at McKinley; asking Quinn for even a chance at a friendship would ruin what little reputation she and Finn still had intact and since they were running for Prom King and Queen, it was painfully obvious Quinn would stick with their usual routine.

"Am I interrupting something?"

Quinn's eyes abandoned Rachel for a moment before meeting Finn's curious ones. She'd been caught completely off-guard by her boyfriend's sudden appearance in the choir room and if he decided to ask, there really wasn't much she could say to defend herself. He was standing barely two feet inside the choir room, which left both girls wondering whether or not he'd heard their altercation; considering how uncomfortable he looked, the answer was particularly evident.

Looking over at his girlfriend, Rachel sighed before packing up her things. The only good that could possibly come out of her remaining in the same room as the two of them was that she might have the opportunity and internal damage necessary to write another mind-blowing song, but she wasn't in the mood to be hounded and mistreated right now; her music was what was important at the moment and considering her dignity was still intact, bowing out now would be better than sticking around to let Quinn make a fool out of her in front of Finn.

"Actually," Rachel broke the silence, smoothing down her blue skirt, "I was just leaving."

For the first time all day, Rachel allowed herself to meet Finn's gaze. It was clear he was having some sort of internal struggle as his mouth twitched in what would have been a reassuring smile had it not been for the glare Quinn was throwing his way. Swallowing the lump in her throat, Rachel slid off the piano bench and ambled towards him quietly, flashing him a sweet smile before slipping past him out into the crowded hallway, leaving the couple to sort out problems that seemed to be a lot larger than herself.

Quinn could only scowl.

"What exactly were you—"

"Don't start with me," Quinn scoffed before he could finish. "We were just talking."

"She was upset," he frowned.

"Rachel's fine, Finn," she narrowed her eyes. "Try not to lose any sleep over it."

"I don't understand why you're so irritated," Finn's frown deepened. "If you were just talking, why are you snapping at me?"

"Last I checked, Finn, I was your girlfriend," Quinn glared at him as she crossed her arms. "And I just can't understand why you always stick up for her!"

"Because I still care about her," Finn scoffed. "You should know that!"

"Maybe if you stood up for me the same way you did for her, I wouldn't mind it as much," Quinn blinked back a few tears. "For some reason, it always comes down to who you care about the most and I always feel like I end up with the short end of the stick! Do you know how much that hurts, Finn? To feel like I constantly come in second to that dwarf who's done nothing but aggravate our relationship?" A couple of tears finally managed to make their way down the slender curve of her cheekbone but Finn didn't back off.

"See, why do you have to call her that?" Finn exclaimed. "I swear, you and Santana constantly coming up with cruel nicknames for her... It's cold, Quinn, and she doesn't deserve it! Maybe if you learned to be a little more humane, you wouldn't feel the way you do!"

"I can't believe this," Quinn whispered, sniffing.

"Did you tell her about us?"

"Excuse me?"

"Did you tell Rachel about us?" he repeated, more adamantly this time.

"I told her yesterday, actually." There was no remorse in her tone. "In the auditorium. She asked me about it and I couldn't lie. Not to her." Her impassive eyes flashed dangerously, daring him to retaliate.

"I thought we said we'd wait until after Regionals."

"No," Quinn shook her head. "You did. You said we'd wait until after Regionals! But this was never about Regionals, Finn, so why keep pretending? Let's just call it what it is! This isn't about Regionals, or Nationals or Glee Club for that matter! This is about your irrational fear of losing your precious Rachel for good if she found out that you got back together with your two-timing bitch of a girlfriend who gave birth to your best friend's baby! Her breath was heavier now, the tears rolling down her face freely as she watched a montage of emotions play on Finn's face.

He could only stare at her, pain remaining etched in his eyes. Her words had been merciless, hitting him like a slap to the face, and hard as he tried, he couldn't think of anything to say to that.

"You only care about your reputation, Finn," Quinn hissed, "and how people see you."

To hear such damaging words leave his girlfriend's lips was horrifying, yet enlightening. The only one with issues regarding their reputation here was Quinn, not that she would ever admit it. This entire relationship had been nothing but a fraud and he couldn't help but feel like an idiot for not noticing it sooner; after everything he'd been through with Quinn last year, he'd really been convinced she'd changed. He'd been proven wrong.

"I care about you," Finn frowned, "but I guess that's not enough."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Quinn seethed.

"You care about reputations," he explained. "Probably more than I do. Isn't that why you got back together with me?"

When Quinn didn't even so much as open her mouth to defend herself, Finn nodded. Quinn had always been the type of girl to care more about appearances than substance and considering how terrible their fall from grace had been last year, he should've been expecting some kind of second motive to her suddenly wanting to get back together.

"Finn," Quinn closed her eyes. "It's not like that. I do love you."

"Why keep on pretending, Quinn?" He clenched his jaw. "Let's just call it what it is."

"I swear to you, Finn, I never meant to—"

"Save it." Finn turned to leave without so much as a second glance. "I don't care anymore."

"Finn, don't walk away from me." The desperation in her voice showed. "Finn!"

Her shrill calls still rang in his ears as he took a seat down the hall in his History class. Honestly, this break-up couldn't have come at a better moment; their entire relationship had become more like a marriage nowadays than a high school romance and a 17-year-old kid just couldn't handle that kind of responsibility.

—

The tears wouldn't stop flowing as Rachel stormed down the hall.

No one should ever have to suffer through so much pain, the brunette thought as she wiped her teary eyes, ignoring the mocking looks thrown her way. The worst part? Everything Quinn had said to her was nothing but the pure and simple truth that Rachel just hadn't been able to bring herself to face. And it was killing her inside, slowly.

Why would someone as popular and beautiful as Quinn Fabray want to be friends with her? Especially when Finn had run into her arms after their break-up? It was almost funny to think that Rachel had ever proposed such an idea to the former head cheerleader. Status meant a lot in Lima, Ohio and Quinn came from a family where status pretty much meant everything.

What was worse, any and all hopes of rekindling her love with Finn had been shot to hell by his unexpected reconnection with her, making a three-way friendship slightly uncomfortable for all parties involved if the chance at one even arose.

"Rachel?"

Turning around at the sound of her name, Rachel was suddenly more confused than upset. Of all the people in the school to acknowledge her presence, Sam Evans stood watching her by his locker, one hand still rummaging through it for something, as his deep green eyes stared back at her. The concern in them was the key thing that confused her. Again, fate must have been playing her a cruel hand, one that she couldn't reach out to even if she desperately needed to; Sam couldn't possibly be what she'd been searching for since her impromptu break-up. It just wasn't fathomable.

"Sam." Rachel acknowledged him politely. "How are you?"

"Fine, thanks." He bit his bottom lip, unsure. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything's fine." Rachel's eyes dropped to her feet for a moment.

"Really?" Sam chuckled. "Because you've walked past me about four time in the past five minutes." He added an empathetic smile as he tried to catch her eyes but she continued averting hers every so often. "Judging by how puffy your eyes are, you've been crying, too." She instinctively reached up to dab her eyes with a tissue once more, a light red blush tinting her cheeks.

"I'm fine." Rachel collected herself "Really."

Before he could say anything else, Rachel hurried on past him. He'd never spoken to her outside of Glee Club before, other than an occasional greeting if they were unlucky enough to bump into each other. It was definitely curious of him to voice concern about her since not many, including her fellow Glee Club members, paid much attention to her dilemmas.

"Rachel, wait a second!"

Shutting his locker, Sam darted after her, skillfully avoiding any collisions with the students around him as he caught up. Damn him and his athletic abilities, Rachel thought to herself as she glanced over at him rather surprisingly.

"Look," Sam began. "I know we didn't exactly get off on the right foot—"

"It's more like we never got off any foot, really," Rachel pointed out.

"Right." Sam hesitated after that. How could he put what he was trying to say if they'd barely said a word to each other? "Look, regardless of what it may have been, if Mr. Shue's talks about how we're a family actually mean something, then I'd at least like to try and make an effort here, Rachel." He gave her an encouraging smile, hoping she'd take the peace offering.

"What about Quinn?" Rachel inquired.

"Quinn influenced me from the moment I got here," Sam sighed, "and as you can see, listening to her hasn't exactly paid off. She was the one who cheated on me, not the other way around, so she has no say on who I'm friends with." His tone was affirmative and decided. "I'll admit, when people first told me why no one liked you, I could understand why at times," Rachel looked away bashfully, "but most of them are wrong about you."

Her brown eyes shot to his baby blues. Sam was a sweet guy; that'd been made obvious after his short-lived romance with Quinn. He had unquestionable talent of his own and Rachel could see them singing a couple duets together without the need to correct his vocals. Thankfully, his reputation had yet to take off as a football stud so befriending him wouldn't do him any harm. Still, Rachel hesitated.

"I really appreciate this, Sam," Rachel replied dejectedly, "but I'm afraid it isn't the best idea, mostly because the root of all my disasters is the person I know you haven't been able to get over since the whole Mono incident last week. I know I still have nightmares about it."

"Quinn's irrelevant," Sam brushed it off. "Friends?"

He held his hand out to her, hoping she'd take this small truce. Rachel did, and all because she'd never heard anyone call Quinn Fabray irrelevant; being first choice for once made it easy for this budding friendship to prevail.

Smiling brilliantly, Rachel shook his hand. "Friends."


End file.
